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Saturday, September 13th, 2008
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8:15 pm - A Note
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5:41 am - Rant
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| Tuesday, September 9th, 2008
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8:40 pm
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The frame shop is going to make me bipolar. On one hand, I love it because it's interesting, creative, and challenging. On the other I get bored with putting things together and spending two hours cleaning a single piece of glass. I feel so accomplished somedays because I'll get three orders completely done and out the door, and the very next day I spend six hours on a project that Ii don't get done. It's up and down everyday, and on the bad days I worry that my manager will fire me. Granted, I'm still in training, and training lasts three months, but it's not exactly good for either my morale or self-esteem to be told that I need to redo the project I spent three hours on.
I've never worried about losing a job before. To be a bit snobbish, I've never been bad at a job before. I've always been in retail, and even though I hate it, I'm good at it. But this takes skill and practice, and I beat myself up everyday for not getting it right the first time. It's irrational to expect yourself not to make mistakes, but I do, subconciously; I expect myself to be good at anthing I'm asked to do. It's quite the letdown when I can't. I feel embarassed and guilty for not suceeding, and then I'm down for the rest of the day.
I guess this is a time where my pride doesn't hurt anyone but me (as usual). I suppose I will just have to take some time to practice until I'm as good as I expect myself to be.
current mood:  frustrated
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(comment on this)
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10:48 am - A Bit About Bethany
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So, me. Not my favorite subject in the world, but I suppose something anyone looking at this journal will want to know.
I'm female, nineteen, and live in the state of Iowa, USA. I live with my fiancé and our cats, which is what keeps me going most days. I work full-time in a frame shop, which is totally the job for the anal retentive like me (though sometimes it even frustrates me, they're so picky). I spend my time that's not involved with working writing and roleplaying (and occasionally I manage sleep and food).
I've been roleplaying since I was thirteen, which was the majority of my social interaction until, oh, my eighteenth birthday. I've been writing about as long, though I have trouble finishing things. Hopefully I'll be able to finish the novelish thing I'm working on someday, but I'm in a rut, currently.
I'm a fan of Supernatural and Heroes, though I have to wait for everything to come out on DVD to watch it, so I'm always about a season behind (soon, I shall have Supernatural Season Three...). I'm terribly analytical, though, so my rambles about them get pretty long (such as my current hatred of Hiro, grr).
I think telling you about anything else would constitute as whining, so I'm going to stop there.
current mood:  sleepy
current music: Butterflies and Hurricanes - Muse
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, September 7th, 2008
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4:48 pm - I am here!
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And there is not much else to it at the moment.
At least this means I can go icon hunting. Best waste of time ever invented.
current mood:  accomplished
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(comment on this)
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embarrassed